Explicit Lyrics Opened Up An Honest Communication With My Teen

Are you ready for this? I know the title might come across as strange, but hear me out. It’s the story of how 2 Chainz—yes, that 2 Chainz—became an unlikely guidepost in my journey through the complex landscape of parenting. If you’re wondering, “Who is 2 Chainz?” pause and click here to catch up with the rest of civilization. For those who are still with me, let’s embark on this ride.

As parents, we’ve all faced those tricky situations where our kids’ interests don’t quite align with our own values. How should we handle these delicate scenarios? What’s the best way to balance open communication with guiding them down the right path?

I faced this parental dilemma a few years back and wanted to share my experience in hopes it provides some insights for other parents navigating these choppy waters.

The Drive That Changed Everything

I was driving my son to middle school one morning when he asked if he could play some music. Eager to bond over something he enjoyed, I obliged without thinking twice. But within seconds of him syncing to the car stereo, an explicit rap song came through the speakers. I froze up, conflicted and unsure of how to react. No, it wasn’t the music genre. I’m a big fan of old-school hip-hop. It was the fact that a 12 year old started playing this music.

In the moment, every fiber in me wanted to turn the music off. I was torn: Do I shut it down, or do I acknowledge that I had opened this Pandora’s box myself? I stayed calm and let the song play out. My son glanced over, puzzled by my uncharacteristic lack of reaction. After dropping him off at school, I spent the morning thinking how to address the situation.

Echoes of the Past: Lessons from My Father

This moment took me back to my own childhood, a time filled with a lot of emotional complexity. My father had strong opinions, especially about music and movies. He believed that MTV and bands like Metallica and Guns N’ Roses were corrupting influences. His disapproval taught me only one lesson: hide what I liked from him. Along with music, I also started hiding other stuff that could’ve been more consequential for my future.

I didn’t want that with my son. I realized this was a teachable moment, a chance to have an open discussion about different forms of expression like music, movies, art and age-appropriate content.

A New Approach: Breaking the Cycle

Determined not to repeat the mistakes of the past, I did some research and found that 2 Chainz is a college graduate. Armed with this new perspective, I decided to approach the issue differently.

After picking my son up from school, I had him play the song again. Puzzled by my request, he obliged. After it finished, I asked him what he thought about the artist and the song’s lyrics. He shrugged and gave a typical middle schooler response – he didn’t really know the artist or cared about the words, he just liked the beat and how it got him pumped up before his swim practice.

I explained that explicit content and provocative lyrics are often used by artists for their shock value so they gain attention and sell records. However, in most cases, it does not represent who they really are in real life. Just like actors play roles in movies, musicians also portray fictional characters in their songs.

If you believe that everything you hear in a song is true then you might as well believe that Daniel Radcliffe gets around London using a broom stick.

The Power of Open Communication

Ultimately, I told my son that I did not want to police his musical tastes, as long as he was staying focused on his school work and other important activities. I explained that as long as any of his entertainment choices did not interfere with his grades or extracurriculars, I was okay with him exploring music, even if I wasn’t a fan of it.

I realized that maintaining a trusting, open dialogue was far more critical in the long run than exercising my parental authority in this specific situation.

Every generation has its own version of 2 Chainz. Some of the biggest artists (Kiss, The Rolling Stones) we now pay thousands of $ to see perform live were once considered the ‘bad influences’ of their day. But their audiences today are a diverse group of successful, well-adjusted adults who didn’t let lyrics dictate their life choices.

Takeaways

Parenting often requires navigating gray areas. The best we can do is transform difficult, uncomfortable situations into teachable moments.

A child’s interests in music or media will come and go, but what they learn from our reaction will have a far more long lasting impact.  So choose your battles wisely.

Have you faced any similarly tricky parenting dilemmas? I’d love to hear how you navigated challenging situations with your own kids. Please share your experiences and insights in the comments!

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